Is wanting validation from others a sign of weakness? Yes, and that’s not a bad thing. When we validate someone, we make them stronger. In fact, the words “valid” and “value” come from the same Latin root “valere,” or what we now call “valor,” which means be strong. Understanding validation is so important because it communicates that who the other...
Read MoreDoes connection happen effortlessly? Or does it take work? An inside joke among close friends. An encouraging word from a parent to their child. A gentle hand on the lower back from a loved one. These are all small ways that we connect with one another effortlessly. When we feel loved and accepted in our relationships, these gestures are simply...
Read MoreNeuroscientist Dan Siegel defines the mind as an embodied, relational, self-organizing entity that processes and regulates the flow of information and energy. This means that the mind is not simply the brain or brain activity—the mind is connected to the entire body. EMBODIED Mindfulness is key to deepening self-awareness, acceptance, and emotional regulation. There is a pre-sensing activity of being...
Read MoreMy toddler loves to pretend everything is a choo-choo train, play with firetruck toys, and wave at the garbage collector. However, sometimes, it seems like his favorite activity of all is to throw tantrums! Especially during transitions, he will kick, scream, and cry. My wife and I have tried so many different strategies to help him. The other day, I...
Read MoreThe word trauma is thrown around quite a bit these days. We think we know it when we see it, but defining it is a harder. However, recent advances in neuroscience help us to understand what’s happening in the brain during trauma, and to distinguish trauma from anxiety and depression, which are often related. And while we’re only at the...
Read MoreAfter 22 years of marriage and over 25 years of providing therapy, there is a common question I often hear. Do opposites attract? My husband’s hobby is playing video or complicated role play games and my hobby is being active and endurance trail running. I am literally falling on my face to go to sleep around 9:00 p.m. and he...
Read MoreRachel Thomas, LMFT Certified EFT Therapist and Supervisor I can hear a song and it will catapult me right back to that moment in my childhood. When I hear the 1990 Sinead O’Conner’s hit, “Nothing Compares 2 U” it brings me to my experience with my best friend in high school. We thought it was amazing that whenever we were...
Read MoreThe “most wonderful time of the year” is full of so many expectations—those we place on ourselves, and those placed on us by others. We eagerly anticipate the break from work and the delights that await us, but—as I’m sure we can almost all attest to—it doesn’t take much during the holidays for our mental health to tank, quickly. So,...
Read MoreI’m a huge fan of the show Ted Lasso and in this latest season Ted recognizes that he needs the support and guidance of the psychologist Dr. Sharon Fieldstone. In this short clip, he shows the vulnerability of feeling the need for help and the fear of “going there” at the same time and within minutes, leaves the room. https://etcanada.com/news/815653/ted-lasso-has-second-thoughts-about-facing-his-mental-demons-in-new-sneak-peek/...
Read MoreIf you struggle with anxiety you know how debilitating, how scary, and how lonely it can be. If you have family or friends that struggle with anxiety, you know how hard it is at times to reassure, to try to help them see "logic", and often how helpless you can feel as you watch your loved ones struggle. I fit...
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