Ready or Not

I’m a huge fan of the show Ted Lasso and in this latest season Ted recognizes that he needs the support and guidance of the psychologist Dr. Sharon Fieldstone. In this short clip, he shows the vulnerability of feeling the need for help and the fear of “going there” at the same time and within […]

Accepting Anxiety

If you struggle with anxiety you know how debilitating, how scary, and how lonely it can be. If you have family or friends that struggle with anxiety, you know how hard it is at times to reassure, to try to help them see “logic”, and often how helpless you can feel as you watch your […]

Do You Hate Being Asked, “How Does That Make You Feel?”

I can’t think of one person who likes being asked that question. There’s something inherently off putting about being asked—“how does that make you feel?”—articulated with a tone spoken to with young children. One of my clients requested of me during our first session together never to ask him that question—and I could relate. As […]

Slowly

I’m on vacation with my kids and friends on the central coast of California. I have rarely looked at my phone, checked my email or worried about chores or work to do. In fact, we have chosen to have almost no particular schedule at all and that freedom and flexibility has felt amazing. When we […]

Parenting: The Art of Letting Go

I recently said goodbye to my two daughters. One is studying abroad in a country far away that has limited Wi-Fi, political unrest, and a culture far different than what she is accustomed to. The other moved across the country to pursue her career and embark on a new adventure.   Both good-byes, though different, felt […]

On “Letting it Be” : Managing Feelings for Former Partners

“It’s not a matter of letting go- you would if you could. Instead of “Let it go” we should probably say “Let it be.” Jon Kabat-Zinn If only we could just “let it go.” If only we could control our feelings in a such a manner that we could ask them to disappear. How wonderful […]

The Power of Physical Touch

I have a soul connection with my 10-year-old son, Zachary. When I was little, instead of naming my Ken doll (of Ken and Barbie) “Ken” I always said “Zachary”. I always knew I wanted to name my son, Zachary. Then in 2007, here comes this sweet, smiling, happy baby boy. Of his 10 years, that […]

Take a Risk…Feel the Fear

Dr. Brene Brown says. “We’re all afraid. We just have to get to the point where we understand it doesn’t mean that we can’t also be brave.”   It’s interesting as a parent, witnessing my children walk through their fears. Whether it be a drum performance by my 12-year-old daughter or my 10-year-old son giving […]

Who is the right therapist for you?

I often say to potential clients, that it’s challenging enough to decide you want to see a therapist, but then navigating the process of finding the right therapist can be overwhelming. There are so many factors that go into finding your “right” therapist. Ultimately, this is going to be the person who can help you […]

The Rules of Dating According to Rae

dating

A lesson from the Dalai Lama: “Follow the 3 Rs: Respect for self, Respect for others and Responsibility for all your actions.” This sums up my feelings about the rules of dating. There are many published books in which others have enumerated dating rules and/or etiquette, including what to wear, what to say, when to […]